Sunday, April 01, 2007

Insults Galore

Have you ever been in an argument with somebody and got the worse of it because you lacked the proper put down?

Me too.

So when I saw a book called 2000 Insults for all Occasions at the bi-annual Oakville library book sale (where they sell books for something like 10 cents a pound) I snapped it up.

According to the blurb on the back of the book it's jam-packed with "on-the-spot ammunition that will annihilate your antagonist with the squelch of the party!"

Oh boy, I can't wait for some wise guy to take me on because now I can sting him with zingers like these:
  • You got a fat chance to get me sore -- and a head to match!
  • While you don't get yourself X-rayed to see what people see in you.
  • I don't know what makes you tick, but I hope it's a time bomb.
  • I can't think what I will do without you, but it's worth a try.
  • Don't you ever get tired of having yourself around?
Hmm, not sure this stuff will actually "annihilate" anybody.

Upon closer examination, I see this book was published in 1965; maybe people were easier to insult back then.

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