(Note this column, originally appeared in the Ottawa Hill Times on October 14, 2018)
I know it’s my job, but right now it’s really difficult for
me to write or even to think about politics.
That’s because my wife of 30 years, and the person who meant
more to me than anything else in the universe, recently passed away.
And it all happened so fast.
Just a few short months ago, Patti and I were a happy
couple, looking forward to growing old together.
Now she’s gone; I’ve lost not only my wife, but my best
friend and my soul mate.
As you might imagine, the grief I’m enduring is almost
unbearable.
In the last few weeks of her life, when we knew all hope was
lost, when he knew the cancer within her was unstoppable, I became
her full-time nurse, doing everything I could to make her comfortable.
And it was during that sad period that I was reminded of how
much time we all spend worrying and fretting about things which, in the grand
scheme of life, don’t really matter all that much.
This is especially true about politics.
As a matter of fact, as I watched my wife’s life slowly fade
away, it seemed so odd to me the way people were working themselves up into an
emotional frenzy over things that more than likely wouldn’t impact their
personal lives.
What I mean is, people react to things like the Ontario
Premier invoking the Notwithstanding Clause or a backbench MP crossing the
floor, or a politician tweeting about diversity, as if they were all matters of
life and death.
But they really aren’t.
Indeed, at the end of the day, does it really even matter to
most of us who wins the next federal election?
Probably not; the lives of 99 percent of the Canadian
population will go on as usual no matter who wins in 2019.
In other words, on the day after the 2019 vote, the sun will
still rise as it always has.
Yes, I know for partisans, who like to get emotionally wrapped
up in the issues of political combat, what I’m saying here seems like
blasphemy.
After all, politics has morphed into a zero-sum game
where the players desperately want their political team to win.
In fact, so desperate are the players, that if their
political team doesn’t win, it often sends them off into a deep, dark funk –
they become depressed or angry, they lash out at the “other side.”
And in the process of generating this constant state of
anxiety, they end up magnifying in their minds the importance of politics,
making any loss or setback intolerable.
Of course, the media and advocacy groups do everything they
can to keep all sides in politics agitated to the max, because, let’s face it,
conflict and anger make for both good copy and for more donations.
So everybody is angry all the time. And that’s not good.
Now don’t get me wrong here, I’m not saying we shouldn’t
care about politics or about promoting our ideals.
We absolutely should, since that’s what makes democracy
work.
My point is simply, that we need to keep a sense of balance
in our lives; we need to remember what truly matters to us personally.
In short, we should keep our priorities straight.
And when it comes to our priorities, nothing should matter
more to us than the happiness and health of our loved ones.
That’s all I’m saying.
So the next time you feel yourself getting all upset and
irate because your “side” lost an election or lost a policy fight, just remind
yourself, there’s a lot more important things you could lose.
